EasyCon

Easyjet are to trial allocated seating for a nominal fee:

Come fly with me, let's fly, let's fly away
If you want front row, then we’ll have it so
But there's a supplement to pay.
Come on fly with me, we'll float down in the blue.

Fly with me, let’s zip down to the shore
And if the plane’s to crash, you’ll be glad you asked
For a seat by the exit door
Come on fly with me, you’ll be glad that you paid more.

And once you get seated where there’s leg room to spare
We’ll compare, how others fare
Those who don’t pay mightn’t be next each other or near
You might even fear, a gang will appear because we’re seated together

Travel-wise it’s such a sad, sad day.
Just say the words, extra cost incurred, and they’re laughing all the way
It’s not a ploy to make an extra buck they say
Come on and fly with me, let’s fly, let’s fly away

Roman Horde Found in Bath

Archaeologists working on a site in Bath have stumbled across 30, 000 Roman coins believed to be the 5th largest hoard ever found. Discovered 150 metres away from the historic Roman Baths, experts can only assume that the money is from coin operated lockers.

A Cure For Baldness? Don't make us laugh.

Scientists have discovered a protein which triggers hair loss which they hope will be key in finding ways to treat baldness. Phil and Grant remain sceptical.

Cut, Colour and Cancer

Hairdressers should be trained to spot cancer
Is the latest from experts in health.
They can look for signs while they’re cutting
And check skin that we can’t see ourselves.

By detecting melanomas early
There’s a much greater rate of prevention
But would it do more harm than good
Although made with the best of intentions? 

Every freckle and mole from the neck up
Would become the source of a scare
And if they’re scouring your scalp for symptoms
How much effort’s going in to your hair?

Would stylists want the responsibility
Of making judgements without all the facts?
For a poor haircut you might be forgiven
But misdiagnose them and they won’t come back.

Is it Time to Make Toy Story 4?

Disney says it expects to lose $200 million dollars as it's latest film, John Carter, bombs at the box office. No, wonder; it didn't have any songs. Just saying.

The Parent Song

I don’t have time to pack their lunch
But why do schools let children munch
On bags of chips covered in salt?
Blame the school teacher, it’s not my fault.

I can’t stop the choices my child makes
It’s up to them if they want cakes.
We’re a fast food culture is what they learn.
Blame the government, it’s not my concern.

I buy them it to keep them quiet
But burgers aren’t part of a healthy diet.
They just want it because it’s on TV.
Blame the broadcaster, but don’t blame me.

I support the move for them to halt
Adverts for food high in fat and salt
And show them only after nine.
To coincide with kids’ bedtime.

With that in place I have no doubt
My children will cut all junk out
So long as I can get over the stumbling block
Of getting them to sleep before nine o’clock.

Ocean's 14

George Clooney may have to get the old gang back together after being arrested during a protest outside Sudan's embassy in Washington DC. The actor, who was trying to raise awareness over Sudan's huminatarian crisis has since been released. Or did he escape?