A Glossary of Media Terminology #1

‘Double dip recession’ – an economic slump characterised by families using bathwater twice to save on heating bills

Edinburgh Zoo acquires cash cow. Or should that be panda?

Long ago in evolution,
The panda chose a strange solution;
To only eat shoots of bamboo
And relocate to where it grew.

So after 5 years’ negotiation
It seemed to most a great occasion
When China made a gift of two
And sent them off to Edinburgh Zoo.

They came by plane to bond our nations,
To aid research and education,
To help the panda’s conservation,
But, what about the rich donations?

From visitors who flocked to view
The half a million revenue
We pay each year to keep the bears.
A princely sum for just a pair.

Any hints of a commercial deal
Lie buried under public zeal,
And motives not quite black and white
Are wrapped up in the fiscal plight

Of the zoo which felt reduced exposure,
Which closed the exotic bird enclosure,
And started charging guests a fee
For a parking space that once was free.

So now the park has got a lift
From China’s diplomatic gift
And think of the financial boost
Having bear cubs might induce.

Yet it might prove a risk to count
Bamboo shoots before they sprout.
Not only difficult to feed,
Notoriously hard to breed,
And it only took a month until
The furry pair had fallen ill
With colic as the diagnosis,
But homesickness a clear prognosis.

Now they're both back on display
After all, who else would earn their pay?















Pandas fight for the window seat on flight to Edinburgh

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